Current mood:	creative
Current music:	stronae, Baby Got Rack

Baby Got Rack
My tribute to geeky women. With apologies to Sir Mix-a-Lot. :)


Baby Got Rack

~Talking~
Oh my god
Becky, look at her laptop
It is sooo big
She looks like one of those geek guys' girlfriends
But y'know, who understands those geek guys?
They only talk to her because she looks like a total nerd
I mean, her laptop, it's just sooo big
I can't believe it's so square, it's like out there
I mean -- it's gross
Look, she needs some... sun!

~Rapping~
I like big procs and I cannot lie;
You other coders can't deny
That when a girl logs in with a Gigafloppin' RISC
And solid state for its disk
You get sprung
Wanna pull up tough
'Cause you noticed that rack was stuffed!
Deep in the slots, it's RAID 5
And a T-3 just to stay live
Oh, baby I wanna log in ya
And scan your picture.

My yuppies tried to warn me
But that rack you got
Makes me so horny
Case paint of smooth tan
You say you wanna get in my van?
Well use me, use me,
So long as I get an I.D.

I've seen her typin'
On azithromycin.
She's a shrill pill,
Got it flowin' with the VapoChill.

I'm tired of magazines
Saying minitowers are the thing.
Take the average tech man and ask him that;
She gotta pack much rack.

So Fellas (yeah) Fellas (yeah)
Has your girlfriend got the proc? (Hell yeah)
Tell her work it (work it), work it (work it),
Work that beefy proc;
Baby got rack.

(Mini-Rap -- HP case with a liquid coolant)

I like 'em big, and square,
And when I'm throwin' an error
I just can't help myself
I'm actin' like my manager
(Now *he's* a scavenger!)

I wanna get you home
And mount, double-up, mount, mount!
I ain't talkin' Playstation
'Cause silicon chips are made to run!
I want 'em four to a module:
So find that MP backplane;
Stronae's had some eyestrain
Goin' for the shortest path endgame.

So I'm lookin' at users' woes:
Pointy-haired techs talkin' through their nose?
They can have Bill's Windows;
Unix better works our egos.

A word to the goth and geeky
I wanna get with thee
I won't demodulate thee
But I gotta be straight when I say I just need [video game explosion]
'Til a quarter past three
Baby gotta keep it real
Corporate Veeps won't like this peal
'Cause them suits just like to abuse it
But I'd still support your port
'Cause I ping, on token ring,
And I'm down to get you networking!

So Honeys (yeah), Honeys (yeah)
Wanna roll my Town and Country? (yeah)
Then hook it up --
Blow it out --
Even rednecks got to shout:
Baby got rack.

Baby got rack.

Yeah baby,
When it comes to females,
Cosmo ain't got nothin' to do with my selection.
36-24-36?
Only if she's got a P-4...!

So your girlfriend wears green lipstick
Playin' songs by some grunge beatnick.
That maverick ain't got the bandwidth to support her toy NIC;
My Wingman joystick don't want none unless you got hubs, hon!

You can do installs or backups, but please don't lose that proc.
Some gamers wanna play it solo
And reject your parallel flow,
So they clock it, and unlock it,
And I pull up quick to resocket.
So Cosmo says you're weird
Well that ain't to be feared
'Cause your specs are large and your box is hummin'
And I'm thinkin' about comin'
To your home with UPSes
(The power's yours, my Miss!)
With an admin I can't react when
She privileges my login.
Some businessman tried to spam
'Cause his girls were on my LAN.
He had 'net but he sniffed their session
And I show 'em how to V-PN.
So ladies if the case is square
And you wanna dirty chat room lair
Hash s-t-r-o-n-a-e
And type them nasty thoughts
Baby got rack.

Baby got rack.

Pale in the vale but she got much rack...
Pale in the vale but she got much rack...
Pale in the vale but she got much rack...
Pale in the vale but she got much rack...